How A Geek Would Write A Gossip Column

using package.urination;

public No_Class

{

public void BladderinPublic(String name)

{

if (name.EqualsIgnoreCase"Gerard Depardieu")

{

if (context==Integer.Parse(flight_Number))

{

try

{

_P = onTheFloor

}

catch (Exception stewardessYelling)

{

System.Out.Printline("Drunken Pig");

}

}

}

}

}